Driveway Ticket, Pond Diving, & Chuck E.
[Hey purrreents and youth people – a few social media posts over at Patheos for you if you are interested: one on the video app Vine, and one on the joys and woes of the “disappearing”-photo app that is SnapChat. What else should we talk about?] Driveway Ticket Did you know that cops sometimes pull you over in your own driveway? I did. Because it happened to me about an hour ago. I saw him pass me about a block from my house, pull a u-ey, and follow me right up into my driveway. Lights a blazin. Right in front of the new neighbors I haven’t met yet. “Hi, welcome…
Tubular Rescues & Flour Fun
I went to the dentist a few weeks for the first time in like 4 years, and I really only went because of the cavernous hole in my molar that my gum kept getting snagged on. I thought for sure a filling fell out, which was accurate, but it fell out because there was a cavity underneath the filling. (Is that a thing? I just typed a bunch of words that I think the dentist said but I could be way off.) As he was filling the cavity he was all, “WOW. That’s a really big cavity.” so that made me feel pretty good about the state of my teeth.…
Being a Momma
Dinner was on the stove last night – some sort of summer squash/bell pepper/onion medley that was seriously looking rough. I went to mask the vegetable flavor with some shredded cheese and – we were out. Since my husband has the gag reflex of a 4 year old when he eats veggies, there’s no way this thing would be edible without being smothered in cheesy goodness. I scooped Beckett up, loaded him in the car, and pulled into the Albertson’s parking lot .25 miles away. What is the difference between boys and girls? A boy, even a 15 month old, knows that Albertson’s is the store that has the carts…
Broccoli Butt & Advent
Broccoli Butt Every time I pick Beckett up from the nursery at church, I overhear the ladies saying to other moms, “She ate some of the sauteed carrots and most of the kale.” or “He ate all of the zucchini and quinoa!” as I grab my son and his diaper bag that never contain the words “kale” or “zucchini”. His snacks are usually made by a friend of mine, General Mills. I was feeling some peer pressure, so last week I sent that dude with some steamed broccoli and cantaloupe. Talk about mom of the year, y’all. That is nutritious as it gets. The only problem is steamed broccoli smells…
Mom Fail Confessions & a Shootout
I don’t want to say it’s been a super hard day, but I did just have to send a text that said something like, “Hey – just got your voicemail and I’m sorry but this isn’t Bonnie from Granbury from Match.com. I hope you find love her.” I have no idea how old the guy is or what he looks like, but I do have his name and number. Any single ladies want to give him a hollerrrr? Mom Fail: Slide Edition Last week I got into a less than ideal situation where Beckett climbed to the highest part of the playground, a section I didn’t think he could actually…
WT Mom, Cops, & Camaros
The big news of the week is that Beckett is walking. Or at least periodically taking multiple steps. I’m not sure at what point I can classify him as “a walker” but he’s well on his little way. I’m so clueless about children. I was always under the impression that by the time babies could walk, they were pretty much self-sufficient. If they were old enough to walk, they were certainly old enough to get me a drink or make me a sandwich…right? Now that Beckett is to that magical age, I’m sad to report that he’s very much still a baby. Nobody’s making momma anything. I’ve already admitted I’m…
PTSD & Characters
Post-Traumatic… How did I end up with an incredibly easy baby and a super high-maintenance dog? I mean, really. Come on. Mack has started doing this really cool thing where he sneaks off to a quiet corner of the house to tremble. I find him under the kitchen table, behind the rocker in the nursery, or on our bed. Just sitting there. Shaking uncontrollably. Something horrifying probably happened that day to freak him out, like my cooking on the stove, turning the bath water on, or dropping something on the tile floor. These may seem like normal, every day occurrences to you, but to my 70 pound lab they…
One year later.
It was one year ago, today. I stayed home from work, mostly because I didn’t want to go in, but also because I had a smidgen of illness on the side. Like, maybe, a sniffle. Or two. …ok so it was mostly because I didn’t want to work. The morning went quite nicely – what with the 3 movies I watched in bed before my feet even hit the floor. The moment I decided to drive to Target to buy pregnancies tests “because I’d never taken one and that’s what married people do periodically” is when things got crazy. Fast forward: two positive tests later, I was nearly hyperventilating as…
Well-being & Sleepyface
A Beckett post. (What else did you expect?) Well-being On the well-being of my son… If I sat down and thought about all the ways Beckett could be injured, scarred for life, or miss an opportunity to learn something, I would go i-n-s-a-n-e. Clinically insane. So, I don’t think about it. I just do the best I can. I have to trust that the church nursery ladies won’t leave him in the corner and fail to notice if he falls unconscious, or that his skin won’t melt off when I bathe him more frequently than suggested, or that letting him sleep in his crib before the age of 2 won’t…
