Bad Luck Mack
You know the Bad Luck Brian meme? That is my dog in real life. If there is a situation that could go wrong with a dog, he’s your dude. He is Bad Luck Mack. If you know anything about our dog, you know that he’s a handful. He’s a nervous Nancy who quite possibly suffers from an anxiety disorder. You may also know that his anxiety has skyrocketed again recently. (Having nothing to do with the accidental tail severing. Haha…hah…ha..h.) We thought we could solve the issue by just sticking him in the back yard any time we left the house (which is when his anxiety kicks in), but a letter from the city…
On breaking up with perfection. (And choosing to be a dinosaur instead.)
When my husband comes home from work, I brace myself for the question that will inevitably come out of his mouth. “What did you guys do today?” This question is my nemesis. Not the way my husband asks – and certainly not how he intends it – but the way I interpret it. We live in a Pinterest time of DIY sensory bins and handprint turkey crafts and weekly cleaning charts and crockpot meals. We live in a Facebook time where people only post the 1 out of 47 pictures taken where everyone is smiling and where the activities they planned actually went according to plan. We live in an Instagram time where filters hide…
Sexy Eyebrows & Pumpkin Patch Portraits
What in the heck is up with Halloween these days? The boys and I went on a walk around the neighborhood the other day and came up to a house with a bloody corpse hanging from a noose on their tree. Like….really? Really really? “Mommy, what’s that?” “That, buddy, is poor judgment.” And costumes these days?? That’s a joke, right? In my extensive Google search for “Halloween costumes for chubby babies” (true story), I came across the following real-life, available-for-purchase costumes: Sexy Olaf Sexy Marshmallow Man Sexy Garbage Truck Driver Are we that desperate to show off our ta-tas, American women? PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER, PEOPLE. You’re ruining costumes for everyone. This has…
Nekked Cheerio Hoarders
When Taylor got home from work he found a post-it note saying, “ARM YOURSELF” with a can of silly string underneath. A war ensued. It was the second best decision made in our house this week – the other being the unnecessary 8oz of cream cheese we added to a white chicken chile recipe. Uhyesplease. The Art of Nakedness It doesn’t matter these days how many clothes I put on my 3 year old boy or how difficult said clothes are to take on/off. It doesn’t matter if they come with 14 buttons or none. Zippers or elastic. At some point during our day (usually at several points) I find…
