A Pregnancy Story, Take 2

2 1/2 years ago, I went to a walk-in, drug-testing clinic to have a blood pregnancy test. Why? Because I had just taken two home pregnancy tests that were positive. I needed the clinic to tell me the tests were wrong, since a) I was 23, having been married for less than 2 years, and b) I was on birth control.

Well, ladies and gents, the tests were indeed accurate. The blood test came back positive, but even before that, it was confirmed by the clinic phlebotomist:

Lady: Girrrl I knew you was pregnant when you came in.
Me: Really? How did you know?
Lady: Because I saw your little “pudge”.

Let the record show that I was less than 4 weeks pregnant. So by “pudge” she meant normal belly full of Chipotle burrito, considering I didn’t have a real pregnancy “pudge” until about, ohhh, 13 weeks later.

Annnnyyywaaayyyy.

9 months later, after growing both a baby and jowls, a one Wilson Beckett Brooks came into the world.

And almost 2 years after that, that baby somehow became a kid with a personality and an attitude. Funny how that works.

So, since the first time was so easy breezy, getting pregnant on birth control and all, we figured we’d try for a second and it would just magically happen.

Except it didn’t. For several months. Like, close to 9 months.

And Beckett was at the age where everyone commented on his needing a sibling, having no idea we thought so too and were doing our darnedest to make it happen.

Except, oh, that’s right. We’re not really the ones creating the child to begin with.

So God, in his perfect timing, answered our prayers and started forming another perfect Brooks child a few months ago.

(Disclaimer: If you’re panicky right now thinking you might have said something in the past several months that made me cry into my pillow for days, you probably did. JUST KIDDING. Don’t even think twice about it. I had a slight control issue I needed working through, and you helped me along in that process.) 

This pregnancy has already been eventful, in normal Brooks fashion. Around 4 weeks I went in because we thought the pregnancy might be ectopic (which is horrifying and terrible), but it ended up being two little precious twin cysts that were causing the pain.

The “twins”.

And, because I don’t function like a normal adult should, I asked for a sonogram picture of the cysts instead of the baby, so I could scare Taylor into thinking we were having twins.

It worked. (He didn’t seem to notice the big empty circles with no baby inside.)

He was, however, a little bummed when I confessed that I forgot to get a picture of the actual baby in addition to the cysts. Jokes always take priority, people.

Fast forward 4 weeks:

Yesterday was our first appointment where we could hear the heartbeat. It’s such an amazing moment. A little gummy bearish figure with arm and leg nubs, wiggling around (as much as a nubby gummy bear can), with the fastest little heart beat you’ve ever seen. It’s incredible and miraculous and makes me melt into a pile of mom goo.

I cannnoooottt wwaaaaiiiiitttttt to meet this newest creation. And to watch Beckett take the role of big brother.

I don’t want to do any false advertising here, so let me just clear something up…you know the announcement picture above where Beckett is smiling like I just told him he could eat suckers and Cheetos for dinner for the rest of his life?

Do you want to guess how many pictures we took to get that one, sorta fuzzy picture?

433. 

Four hundred and thirty-three photos. For one decent picture.

And do you know how I got him to smile like that?

I flipped him off his car until he was so incapacitated by giggles he couldn’t do anything but sit and hold the stupid chalkboard.

So, no, he’s not that excited about a sibling. He just thinks near-death experiences are that funny.

Also, next time you see that perfect Pinterest family photo, let’s keep in mind that it didn’t really go down as advertised. There are at least 432 outtakes to prove that.

Of course Owl took turns nearly dying, too.

 

And thank YOU for all your love and support for our existing child and the newest member. We are a blessed bunch.