Beach Vacation: 2 Parts Fantastic, 7 Parts Terrible

Why, yes, I do have a glow about me, don’t I? Thanks for noticing.

No, this is not a pregnancy announcement. We just came back from a week and a half at the beach. The end of September/beginning of October is a perfect time to finally get a summer tan, amiright?

We’ve had a Sparks family beach vacation on the books for a while now.

I’d like to report that it was a relaxing, carefree time full of laughter and shrimp. But unfortunately enough, it just wasn’t that kind of get away. It was this kind:

Saturday: Arrive in Cape Sans Blas, Florida, no thanks to Apple maps. Run around like idiots checking out the sweet 4 story beach house. Eat shrimp.

iOS6 maps, you are terrible.

Sunday: Beach time! And Taylor contracts a stomach bug.

we brought our family dog! (just kidding. no idea whose dog this was. he was kind of an umbrella hog.)

Monday – Thursday: Beckett runs a 104 degree fever. Some beach time. Eat shrimp.

Friday: Spend the day at the pediatrician and pharmacy. Diagnosis of strep throat, ear infection, with a side of 4 molars coming in.

 
Saturday: Beckett sleeps 16 hours straight. Eat shrimp.

there was a lot of randomly laying on the floor from this guy.

Sunday: Dad hits a deer on the way to church. Preacher compares baby Jesus to a loaf of bread laying in the manger (or something. I may have missed a point here and there).

Monday: Rent bikes and ride along the coast! Pours rain. Restaurant roof leaks on our table while we eat shrimp.

Tuesday: Drive to the wrong airport. Flight delayed. Plane seatmate large enough he can’t put the armrest down to separate our seats. Mom and 13 month old share 3/4ths of the world’s smallest airplane seat for 2 hours.

So, Florida was a teensy bit crazy, but the shrimp was super delish. It was very fresh. (So fresh we had to wait at the seafood market for them to “peench the heads off” before we could buy a couple pounds.)

Oddling

Remember Beckett’s little Swiffer obsession? As soon as we got to the beach house, Beckett starts exploring everything. A few seconds in, we hear a tiny voice yell, “Mooooommmmaaaaaaa. Mmmoooooooooommmmmmmaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!” from the laundry room. He was yelling for me to get the broom down that was hanging on the wall. Not 5 minutes into vacation and he’s already found a Swiffer substitute to carry around.

That is some weirdo behavior, y’all. It’s a good thing he’s cute.

Trading Bost

When I haven’t gotten a lot of sleep, I get what’s commonly referred to as “the giggles”. It’s kind of endearing if you never want to hear the end of a funny story or a good joke. If I’m tired and trying to tell you something I find humorous, it’s game over. I just giggle uncontrollably while everyone waits patiently for me to finish my sentence.

Most of the time it’s funny because I’m with my family who just laugh at me. Buuuut I’ve been known to be struck with the giggles in a public setting. You know, like when a stranger is waiting on an answer, listening to the end of a story, etc. 

One night on our vacation, Taylor and I went out on a date. We struck up a conversation with a guy at the table next to us and were talking about some of the stores we’d found in town that had groceries, etc. Since Beckett was infected with a death disease a little under the weather, I wasn’t getting a whole lot of sleep…so the giggles were right under the surface, waiting for the right moment to explode.

That time came when I tried to tell this guy about the Cape Sans Blas Trading Post we shopped at, but instead of saying “trading post” I said “trading bost”.

[gigglebox activated]

The scene: I am giggling uncontrollably, Taylor is ordering me from across the table to “Get it together, babe. Get. It. Together.”, the stranger at the next table is waiting for me to finish my story.

…and waiting…

…and uncomfortably fake laughing…

…and waiting some more…

…aaaand finally he just smiles and says, “Well it looks like you two are having a good time…” before he turns around, never to speak to us again.

I ended a potentially life-altering friendship because I said bost. Our conversation with that nice man came to an abrupt halt because I could. not. stop. laughing.

So embarrassing, but so, so funny.

Don’t even get me started on the time I said “jorn” instead of “juice”. I still can’t tell the story aloud without losing it.