Category: parenting

…more like how do YOU doin’ (it)?!

When my 7 week old was screaming the other night – you know, during the “purple cry” hours of 6-8pm – I muttered some, “Oh hush up, you’re fine.” before opening Photo Booth on my computer. Because if you’re going to have an inconsolable child, might as well find a way to entertain yourself to pass the time. […]

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Please Stop Wishing for a Girl on my Behalf

Brooks boy #3 has a name! A real name to put with a real face. (And real javelins disguised as legs that pierce my spinal column with each kick. That’s neither here nor there, just a struggle I’d like to mention.) A real name to get embroidered on bibs because that’s what Southern people love. I’m pretty excited […]

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The Evolution of Pregnancies

Everything is different with each subsequent pregnancy. And I mean everything. Energy, womb elasticity, TUMS consumption…all of it. When you’re pregnant with your first, it consumes you. (And you kind of assume everyone else is consumed by it, too.) You think, eat, talk, sleep, and breathe “like a pregnant person”. Gone is normal life. It’s all replaced by pregnant […]

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The Stall: a Collection of Horror Stories from Public Bathrooms

If you wonder what being a parent is like, gather up as many hyper, destructive humans as you can and bring them in one tiny bathroom stall as you pee. Have them ask questions as loudly as possible such as “ARE YOU GOING POOP?” “WHAT’S THAT SMELL?” “DID SHE JUST TOOT?” while you quietly whisper “don’t […]

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Stroller Splat

During a recent catching-up-on-life conversation, a friend of mine said, “I know it’s been a while since we’ve seen each other, but from what I see on Facebook things are going well. You look like you’ve always got it together!” Hold up. Wait a minute. If that is the impression I have given at any moment […]

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Now Charging Admission

Yesterday, I contributed greatly to society by being a “model” at a clinic for pregnant women in crisis. They were having a nurse training afternoon with a sonographer, and I volunteered my services as the perfect pregnant specimen a pregnant lady not in crisis. The nurses trained on using the sonogram machine, identifying strange baby parts, measuring fetal things, […]

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Witching Hour Chronicles

According to Wikipedia, the most famous non source on the internet, With a modern literal meaning of “midnight,” the term witching hour refers to the time of day and night (12:00 a.m. or 12:00 p.m. is commonly speculated) when creatures such as witches, demons, and ghosts are thought to appear and to be at their most powerful […]

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The Concert that Changed Our Lives

Taylor had been telling me for the better part of a year about his friend from high school who has this amaaaaazing band (his words). I kind of shrugged it off because, honestly, who doesn’t have a friend from high school in a band? So several months later when I told him about this group I […]

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Oversized Baby Discrimination

It’s no secret – I am the proud mama of a chunky baby boy. And by chunky I mean giant. He’s just a giant ball of love. It’s part of his charm. The dude is irresistable. (I would insert  comment here about gobbling him up, but the fact that 3 separate people sent me Buzzfeed’s “There’s […]

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On breaking up with perfection. (And choosing to be a dinosaur instead.)

When my husband comes home from work, I brace myself for the question that will inevitably come out of his mouth. “What did you guys do today?” This question is my nemesis. Not the way my husband asks – and certainly not how he intends it – but the way I interpret it. We live in a Pinterest time […]

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