March 4, 2014
A conversation the other day after work:
Taylor: *points at Beckett* Are those the same pajamas fr–
Me: Are those the same pajamas from when?
Me: Go ahead. Ask it. Are they the same pajamas from…this morning? Is that what you’d like to know?
Taylor: …uhhhhh…I was just…uhhh…because if they’re new for bedtime I won’t…uhh….
Me: They are. Mine are different, but his are the same. Any other questions?
I wouldn’t wish a postpartum wife on anyone.
In other news, I posted this on Facebook the other day:
Aside from the obvious of keeping our second son alive and well for a whole month now, having a newborn really does seem like a piece of cake this time around.
When Beckett was born, transitioning from 0 to 1 child was INCREDIBLY DIFFICULT. But now having 2, I wonder what the heck I did with all my free time on round 1. I mean, honestly. My eyes consumed so much Netflix it’s not even funny. I don’t know why I found that challenging, but I did.
0 to 1 child was its own transition. It was hard in ways I wasn’t expecting: emotionally, logistically, physically.
The same goes for the transition from 1 to 2. The baby part is easy. The other stuff is…challenging.
It’s hard emotionally because of mom guilt. I can’t seem to muster up enough patience for Beckett and all of his 2-year-old glory and that breaks my heart.
It’s hard physically because of time management. If both kids are crying, who gets what they need first? Because both needs are equally important. One needs physical stuff (food, usually), one needs emotional stuff (yes, we still love you, firstborn).
It’s hard logistically because of a whole new human. Hygiene seems to have taken a back seat for all of us. Enough so that sometimes Taylor and I ask each other when we last bathed _____ (fill in child’s name) and neither of us can remember. But listen…as long as everyone is fed and diapered, who cares how clean we all are?
It’s hard postpartumally because I want to jump right back into everything. I’m not very patient with my body or emotions getting back to normal. (Like when I went running the other day. My uterus fell out and landed on the sidewalk.)
Having another new baby is also awesome.
It’s awesome because newborns stay newborns for about 12 seconds, so you relish every single little coo and fart and stretch and gag and whatever else babies do at this age. (The list isn’t very long yet. Newborns are kinda like really sweet, slightly squishy potatoes.) I find myself just sitting and staring at Hutton, furiously trying to stop time but, instead, watching him get bigger by the second.
It’s awesome because we see Beckett fall into his role as big brother. He loves his brother. And is super helpful when he wants to be, 18% of the time.
It’s awesome because Taylor and Beckett have a new bond. They’re two peas in a pod.
It’s awesome because people bring you food and, as a result, you end up with a whole cabinet full of new Gladware.
The New Normal
When people ask how it’s going, we just smile and say, “We’re…adjusting.”
We’re transitioning to life as a family of 4 which is 50% challenging, 50% awesome*.
(*percentages subject to change depending on time of day and nap status/length.)
The thing that excites me the most about our new normal …aside from all the stuff about loving another human with a love I couldn’t have imagined blah blah blah…. is brothers. Brothers excite the heck out of me.
I love that Beckett at some point each day asks, “Is Hutton big yet? He big and can play now?”
We’re working on the whole “be gentle with the baby” thing since Beckett is mostly just interested in seeing how hard he can squeeze/poke/pull/push Hutton before he cries.
Taylor had a very sweet father/son conversation about it the other day, as Beckett was “flying” on Taylor’s feet. He said, “We have to be really gentle with Hutton. It’s like me and you. I’m bigger than you, so I have to be gen — *smashes Beckett’s face into a metal bucket* — huh. Who knew that was sitting there?”
It’s a work in progress for everyone.
But seeing them be brothers, as much as a 4 week old and a 2 1/2 year old can be…that is the best feeling in the world.
The day Hutton really does wake up “big” is going to be epic.
I honestly don’t know how I went from a 4th grader to a high schooler to a college student to a mom of multiple children all in 3 weeks, but that’s what happened.
Thank you, God, for entrusting us with these two perfect little humans. And please stay within arm’s/prayer’s length ’cause we’re gonna need to tap into your love and patience and wisdom if we’re gonna get these boys all raised and contributing to society and whatnot. Amen.